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Surgeon General Advisory: Parental Stress

The 2024 U.S. Surgeon General’s Advisory on the Mental Health & Well-Being of parents tells us that 48% of parents in the U.S. say that most days their stress is completely overwhelming compared to 26% among other adults. These stressors are the result of a wide array of factors, including but not limited to financial strain and economic instability, time demands, concern over children’s health and safety, parental isolation and loneliness, difficulty managing technology and social media, and cultural pressures. This staggering percentage that nearly half of parents in the U.S. are feeling completely overwhelmed is a public health crisis and should be treated as such. When separation and divorce are factored into the parenting equation, the stakes get even higher; these parents are more likely to experience higher levels of stress and loneliness, and difficulty managing finances. Stressors are highest for parents who are recently separated or divorced in comparison to those who have been apart for a longer period. Either way, the logistics and challenges of raising children seldom get easier when parents are living apart, and if one parent is less involved then the time constraints on the primary parent multiply exponentially.

There are things that can be done at every level to help mitigate these challenges for families, and they all begin with recognizing the importance of parenting. According to this report, the mental and physical state of parents and caregivers directly impacts the health and well-being of children, which directly impacts the strength of our society. The nation suffers as a whole when parents go unsupported and children can’t thrive, and solutions are needed now more than ever. At the policy level, there are decisions to be made around access to affordable childcare, medical and mental health care for children, and protected sick leave for parents that could have a direct positive impact on parents’ current stress levels. Employers can provide parents with access to affordable adult mental health care and create in-house programs to support the well-being of parents in the workplace. Communities can encourage open dialogue about parental stress, and create more opportunities for social connections among parents; schools can strengthen and establish school-based support programs, health systems can screen parents for mental health conditions and support interdisciplinary partnerships between primary care and mental health professionals; and researchers can conduct further studies in order to better understand, prevent and improve parents’ mental health and well-being. As individuals, friends and family can offer practical support for busy parents like running errands, doing household chores or providing childcare relief. Cooking a meal, extending an invitation to socialize, going for walks together or making regular check-in calls offering empathy and judgment free support are all small gestures that can go a long way for a stressed out parent.

Just as importantly, parents and caregivers have a responsibility to care for themselves. Exercising, eating well and getting rest, meditating or finding time for creative outlets that provide emotional regulation are all essential pieces of managing stress. Not enough hours in the day for parents to do all that is needed to care for their children while balancing life’s many other responsibilities is a common reality, however, and perpetuates the low-priority status of self-care for many. When parents are living apart and childcare logistics are multiplied, it is not surprising that many divorced and separated parents feel like their own needs just have to come last.

Cultivating a culture in which parents and caregivers can achieve better balance in their lives should be a common goal for all Americans. The U.S. Surgeon General emphasizes the importance of supporting parents and caregivers, and this applies to everyone from top government policymakers down to the parents and caregivers themselves. Parenting should not be this hard. While parents and caregivers may have the primary responsibility for raising children, it takes community involvement, support and commitment in order for parents to succeed at their most important job; raising the next generation to not only survive, but thrive.

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